This is the Always Random and Usually Shallow
Christmas letter for this year. Indy saw that I was too absorbed in the blog to
worry about a letter so he took it upon himself to write one for us. At the
end, he did shamelessly plug the blog for me, though, which I very much
appreciate.
I have also included, in case you didn’t get
one for yourself, the family Christmas photo…the real one this time and not the
one of our butts at thebeach.
Some of you may recall the post I wrote about Indy
a few weeks ago, but in case you missed it, you can go here for more insight into this delight who
lives with us.
If you have any comments or complaints
regarding this letter, please submit them to Attention: Indy.
________________________________________
Merry Christmas!
This letter is from the Always Random and Usually Shallow Family dog: Indy...their faithful and handsome "man's best friend".
And no they did not give me that name…I came
with it when I duped them into bringing me home from the Shelter three years
ago. With my name I also brought my winsome doggie smile and my cheerful and
compliant spirit. You may not know about
me...Mrs. Always Random and Usually Shallow has been a little lax in her
Christmas letter writing as of late. And she’s not even including me in the family
photo!
If you’ve met me at all, you know I may not
be telling the whole truth about my description. I am neither winsome nor
charming or compliant; I am not handsome or loyal either.
But never fear – I do have truthful things to
share. But before I begin please be advised: From here on out, I will refer to Mrs.
Always Random and Usually Shallow as “Mom” and Mr. Always Random and Usually
Shallow as “Dad”, although I am fully-aware they are not my real parents. They are
not nearly as hairy and their teeth are straighter than mine. And their eyes
are the same color…as in both eyes in each pair of eyes are the same color.
(See…you don’t need a picture of me; I am giving you a perfect description
right now.)
I’ll give you a play-by-play of the year, as
best I can remember it. There are some highs and some lows, but mostly it
involves a lot of barking and sleeping on furniture I wasn’t supposed to be on.
But you’d probably be more interested in what the Always Random and Usually Shallow Family did instead.
In January, I have no idea what went on. Mom
wasn’t using her Google calendar yet so it is completely blank. I’m sure there
was some soccer practice for both of my brothers (and yes, I know they’re not
my real brothers…but they’re all I’ve got. Sometimes family is who you love.
But please don’t tell them I love them…I have a reputation to uphold. When
strangers come over, I act so attention-starved that they sometimes think the
Always Random and Usually Shallow Family pays me no heed. It’s a fun game for sure.). But other than that, I can’t
remember anything monumental in their lives.
February…still not much. Soccer practice and
school. At that point, they were half-way through their second year of
homeschooling. And Mom works at a preschool, which is apparently a place with a
bunch of little people running around. I would love to go with them sometime
but they still always make me stay in my room while they’re off having fun.
Maybe someday right? A dog can dream can’t he? Imagine all those little hand
petting me? Sounds fantastic. I hope my endearing underbite doesn’t scare, or
scar, them.
In March, my older brother, the 11yo, broke
his little piggy toe while running through the house. He was in a walking boot
for 5 weeks, but off of soccer for a total of 6. It might not have been as bad
if Mom hadn’t sent him to soccer practice right after that, because she didn’t
know it was broken. Sure he was crying hysterically, but like any good mother,
she gave him ibuprofen and sent him to practice. The swelling and the three
shades of green the next day indicated something more than a stubbed toe was at
play. This break meant no soccer tournament in St. Louis for any of us, which
ended up being a good thing. The whole soccer club traveled to St. Louis for a
tournament which was canceled first thing Saturday morning. We will still at
home snug in our pajamas at that point. Well, I wasn’t in pajamas, but you
understand; the only clothing I ever wear is a Halloween costume.
Also in March, my younger brother, the 9yo,
turned, well, 9. He also played soccer and was even a goal keeper, in spite of
his smallish stature. Fearless, he is, just like me. I’m certain I could play
keeper too if I just had opposable thumbs.
April was more of the same…school, soccer,
preschool. The 11yo did get to return to soccer at the end of April and was
able to finish out the season with no difficulties. I was sad to see him get
back to it…I got lots of time sitting on his lap and being loved on when he had
that broken toe and couldn’t play outside very often.
May brought about the end of the school year
and with it more time for the PBA to be at home with me, which is what they
wanted all along. Time with me. But they
also had a couple soccer tournaments, which to me only meant they were gone all
day when they would usually be at home, enjoying my company. I was sad for them
that they missed me so much while they were away.
In June, the 11yo turned (yes you guessed it)
11, but due to some unforeseen circumstances, the party didn’t happen until
July. My family left for a two-week vacation…I still cannot fathom why they
wouldn’t take me…but the next day, Poppy (that’s Dad’s dad) died unexpectedly.
So my family came home that same day.
They were very tired from 26 hours in a car during a 36 hour period, but
I was glad to see them and I’m sure all my snuggling and tail-wagging made them
feel better. That, and the fact that before they got home, some of their
friends and neighbors brought over a bunch of food so they wouldn’t have to
worry about that too. The fridge was pretty bare, as you could expect, since
they thought they were going to be gone two weeks. Oh, and the friends and
neighbors played with me when they came over too, which was an unexpected
surprise for them. I’m certain they were using the food as an excuse to see me.
In July, we had the 11yo’s birthday party, plus
he had volunteered our house as the meeting place for the Middle School Bible
Study for the month. Both of those events were especially exciting, because it
meant more people were given the opportunity to meet me. I know, as usual, the
party and the Bible Study were just ruses for people to spend time with
me. Call it what you will…I know the
truth.
Also in July, the 9yo and Mom went to church camp
together for a week. This meant Dad and the 11yo got me all to themselves for a
few days. Mom was hoping she and the 9yo would actually spend time together, but
what really happened is that the 9yo hung out with a bunch of boys and Mom
tried to manage a group of sweet, but silly, girls. Mom came home and told Dad
that she had fun but confirmed that God knew what he was doing by giving her
boys.
Also in July, the 9yo had football camp and the
11yo had soccer team camp. Yes, the 9yo gave up soccer for his first love:
football…much to Mom’s chagrin. It may be the first, last, and only time he plays
organized football. Mom despised every minute of it. I have to agree with
her…it’s not the safest sport out there, but what do I know? I bark to go
outside and once you put me outside, I bark to come in. I’m not the best judge
of what might be a good or bad thing.
August brought about changes again…changes
which meant my family wasn’t home to my liking. My brothers started school
(still homeschool, so at least they are home on Mondays and Fridays to pet me
when they want…or when I want, which may be truer than anything. I love to take
flying leaps onto their laps when they are on the couch reading together…I am
not a distraction in the slightest.) The 11yo is now in 6th grade
and the 9yo is in 4th. Wow…time goes so fast. These 21 years I’ve
been with them have simply flown by (see, that’s funny because I’m a dog and
supposedly a dog ages 7 years for each actual 1 year).
Is this microphone on? Is anyone getting
this, because trust me I kill in my neighborhood. Mostly crickets and flies.
Anything bigger scares me.
Oh, and the PBA (that’s the Parker Brothers
Academy, in case you didn’t know…my brothers don’t necessarily care for the
name but Mom thinks it’s funny so she continues to use it) are in a homeschool
co-op this year, so that does take time away from me on Monday afternoons. That
and their music lessons (the 9yo takes guitar, and the 11yo takes drums). The
11yo is taking a Middle School Composition Class (I could have taught him but
again…it’s an opposable thumbs issue), and the 9yo is taking Spanish and
Weather Science (those are two different classes, BTW…but “Spanish and Weather
Science” would be interesting. Maybe next year.)
August was also the start of soccer games and
football games. Which meant my family was away from me for a few week-ends. I
know they were sad. I jumped on them and gave as much affection as I could, as
soon as they released me from my room. I even act that way when they would
simply step outside to get the mail from the mailbox and come right back in. I
wanted them to know that I noticed they’d been gone. I have no concept of time,
so if you’re gone for 2 minutes, it’s the same to me as 2 hours. And vice versa.
You can see why they wanted to bring me home.
In September we had more soccer, more
football, more school work. The 11yo’s soccer team did well, and the 9yo’s
football team made it all the way to the Super Bowl (which was actually in
October…sorry, I’m getting a little ahead of myself. I am a dog, for crying out
loud. The only reason I know there is such a thing as a “calendar” is because I
hear Mom always say, “I don’t know…I have to check the calendar.”)
But they lost in the Super Bowl. Mom wasn’t
sad about it. She’d been telling her friends to pray that he didn’t like
football because he wasn’t going to play it again after this year. But the more
they prayed, the more the team won. They only lost one game before the Super
Bowl. How in the world was he going to not like playing football when he was on
a winning team? Dad still won’t admit it but I think he wants the 9yo to keep
playing football. Next year I will try to remember to tell you who wins, but
I’m betting on Mom.
In October, they actually did leave me at
home for a week and stayed away the whole time. They went to Hilton Head and
that’s where they took their family photo. Which is why I’m not in it. I tried
to convince them to Photoshop me in but they wouldn’t go for it. Plus if you
know them, you would also know that there is no way they would take their
oh-so-beloved pooch on vacation. They seemed to enjoy their time away but I did
not. Though my sitter took great care of me, I wasn’t too keen on her putting
me back in my room, and I snapped and growled at her. So not like me. On the
very day my family was coming home, she had to leave me out of my room for a
while, so I could cool off a bit. Not only did I cool off, but I left a nice
big present by the back door for my family when they got home later that day.
You should have heard their screams of excitement when they saw it, “INDY!!!”
I’ve never been more proud of something I’ve made.
We are still in the throes of November. Soccer
and football are finished for now. The 9yo is playing basketball and the 11yo
is just starting an acting class. Whatever that is. Thanksgiving is upon us
shortly. No decorations or tree are up at the time of this printing. But probably will be by the time you receive
my letter.
I must confess that I’m not a fan of the tree. The first year I was
with my family, they gave me a fancy new collar while they were putting this
tree up in the middle of the living room. When I approached to see what this
thing was, I instantly felt a little jolt right where that new collar was…it
was the darndest thing. That collar and the tree clearly did not get along. I
gave the tree a wide berth the entire time it was there. I’m not taking any
chances this year either…who knows what kind of relationship my current collar
has with the tree.
That wraps things up for us. I did the best I
could remembering their highlights. I may have gotten something confused. Like
I said, I am a dog. And not the brightest bulb in the box either. That’s what
mom says. I don’t know what it means.
Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and a
Happy New Year!
Love,
Indy
P.S. If you are interested in keeping track
of us throughout the year, instead of hoping that Mom gets around to writing a
letter at Christmas time, you can follow us on her blog at
http://1morningglory.blogspot.com/
http://1morningglory.blogspot.com/
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