Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Landscaping Theater Act I

Every good married couple knows their strengths and weaknesses…both individually and together.  They know what projects to attempt with one another and which ones should be separate.  Sometimes it depends on the interest of both parties. If you both are not interested and engaged with said project it might not quite go as planned. 

In fact, if you are not only on separate pages but entirely different play books then it is doubtful that any good is coming out of the situation.
And sometimes the circumstances themselves are just not in your favor.

Let me set the scene for you. It is approximately 13 years ago. Still considered newlyweds, we'd just recently purchased our first home. Not only was it our first house ...it was a brand spanking NEW house.  A blank canvas for us to make into our own decorated creation.  Immediately upon moving in, we tackled the interior of the house: painting, curtains, furniture ...all that fun stuff.
Once I felt like that situation was under control, we decided to tackle the exterior. 

Enter stage left: my husband. 
Enter stage right: me.

We thought we met in the center of the stage to begin the dance we call “landscaping together”. 
Mind you, neither of us had owned a home previously.  My husband did a little bit of landscaping at his parent's home. I was the assistant manager at a local greenhouse /landscaping place for two summers while in college.  Though neither of us will probably admit it now (or at the time), we each thought we knew more than the other did about landscaping.

We headed to the local nursery to make our first selections. We learned quickly that we had somewhat similar tastes in what we liked and what we disliked.  That was great. We seemed to be off to a positive start. 
We made some purchases, put them in the bed of our pickup, and with much anticipation, headed home to put together our award -winning beds.  Our fervor was short lived; immediately upon beginning to dig it was abundantly clear that the ground was rock hard. And completely void of nutrients. This former farm land needed some work before it would be good to support new plant growth. 

But being rookies, and somewhat stubborn about such things, we didn't know what we didn’t know and thus forged on ahead. I don't recall exactly how long it took but I do remember some unkind words being said, some yelling, probably some tears. And this is all outside for God and everyone to see...and hear (and yes, I know God sees and hears it all anyway…but being outside makes it seem so much more exposed). Oh this was definitely one of my prouder moments to be sure.
But wait, there’s more; don't forget about the stomping off into the house, leaving the husband to finish the work. Mind you…as I recall it, the majority of the argument was due to frustration at the circumstances and not so much one another. My husband may have a different recollection about it; you’ll have to check with him on that.

But I will admit, possibly for the first time to anyone other than my husband, that this frustration led us to discover something about ourselves as individuals, and as a married couple:  some home improvement projects ....let's be honest here....MOST  home improvement projects go more smoothly when we aren't both involved at the same time.
So here is the arrangement at which we have arrived: I decide what needs to be done.  I buy the materials.  He does the work. Seems fair, right?  Ok, that's not entirely true. Sometimes I decide what needs to be done and he buys the materials and does the work.

This weekend…probably Thursday afternoon in fact… we are having 8-10 tons of river rock delivered to our house in order for us to stone the existing mulch beds. At $9 per ton, the price is right.  So much more economical than mulch. But a lot more work. Heavy work.  And not quick work either.
I tell you all this for one reason.  Pray for us. That's a lot of stone we're going to need to move in just a couple days. That's a lot of time together and a lot of time WORKING together.  I'll keep you posted as it progresses! Stay tuned!

And scene…

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