So, I have touted myself as a morning person and here’s how God has chosen to smite me.
Ok, not really…I know full-well that He doesn’t work that way. Usually.
But I do find this somewhat “humorous”…not so much in a gut-busting belly-laugh, but a “Hmmm…that was interesting” sort of thing.
Last week I was awakened early (twice, I might add) by a kiddo hunched over a toilet.
Yesterday I awoke with the pressing need to pee (TMI, I know, but I’m giving you the full scene)…this never happens, I must tell you. As you may recall, I have a bladder the size of a cow.
Today I was awakened at 4:45 by the sounds of Raving Rabbids (in case you were unaware, there’s a TV show now)…I thought the Wii game was funny but I can’t imagine more than a couple minutes of those annoying noises. I mean, I love kids shows (don’t judge) but even I have my limits.
Here’s a sample, lest you be unaware of how annoying it is.
Actually, as I searched for it, the annoying-ness of it was too overwhelming so you’ll have to Google that for yourselves if interested.
Anyway, I woke up to the noises of the Rabbids and the living room light. But being awakened from a dead sleep, my mind wasn’t quite with my body so I went flying into the living room, thinking someone must be having a seizure or was projectile vomiting.
Anything other than what I saw….which was simply the 10yo sitting on the couch, watching TV. I processed (quickly…my mind was awake now) and the following conversation ensued:
Me: Ummm, do you know what time it is?
10yo: (no response)
Me: Hey! Do you know what time it is?
10yo: (slow head shake) Nope, not a clue.
Me: Well, it’s 4:45 in the morning. You need to go back to bed!
10yo: Oh, ok (as if he didn’t know…)
We both went back to our respective beds. But my heart was still pounding from my little adrenaline rush (nothing like some blood pumping through your veins at top speed to get you going!).
Plus I knew my alarm was going to sound in about 10 minutes.
And then after lying there about 5 minutes, I heard the 10yo’s bedroom door open and saw a head appear in our doorway…kind of like Snoopy’s head in “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown…only I wasn’t as excited as Linus; mine was more Sally-esque.
I didn’t even wait for him to speak; “Come on in, Buddy.”
I knew it was a stretch to ask him to go back to bed, even at that early-hour. He’s my “not so great sleeper”. He’s never been a sleeper, much to our chagrin.
He climbed in bed between us.
Mr. Always Random, has yet to make an appearance in this story, you may have noticed. That's because he slept through it, up to this point.
I was lying on my back (which I never do), because I knew there was no sense in trying to go back to sleep, being that my alarm was not set to go off in about 5 minutes now.
I was also, while lying on my back, praying that the 10yo would suddenly become drowsy and drop back off to sleep.
Well, as you may have already surmised, when my alarm did sound, I was the one who had dozed off. The incessant beeping startled me, causing my arms to spring out from under the covers, thereby knocking over a FULL glass of water next to my bed.
And why, pray tell, was there a glass of water next to my bed? Well, because I sleep with a glass of water next to my bed. I have for as many years as I can remember. And when I don’t have a full glass of water when I go to bed, I am inevitably parched in the middle of the night, but am without enough water to slake my thirst (oh yes…I used the word slake…impressive vocabulary, isn’t it?).
So...I knocked over a full glass of water. And not just onto the floor. No, no. That would have been much too simple. This cup went in the direction of the center of the nightstand…which had the alarm clock, some nail polish bottle, some lotion, a stack of books, a pad of paper, some pens and a lamp. And UNDER the table was a sweatshirt and a pair of socks. All of it: soaked.
Now you may be asking: why do you have all that crap right there when you’re just going to sleep?
Well, first I must call you out on your potty-language…there’s no need for using such vulgar speech. It may all be crap, but it's my crap so you don't get to call it crap.
Second of all, I’m a scout at heart: Always Be Prepared. And I’m prepared for pretty-much anything when I go to bed.
Except for maybe a child getting up at 4:45 to watch TV.
So I’m thorough if nothing else, but not completely so.
But…all this rambling to say, I was up at 5, as I had planned/hoped/intended. (In case you were wondering, I do this, so I can get my quiet time in before I begin my day. If I don’t get up early, chances are that it does.not.happen.)
BTW In case you were wondering, Mr. Always Random DID wake up when I knocked over the water. I'm certain it had nothing to do with my reaction.
And all I can say about the circumstances which have gotten my behind up at 5 these few days is this: sometimes I hit the snooze when I don’t necessarily want to. And because for various and sundry reasons I have actually been up at the crack of o’dawn-thirty each day for the past two weeks, I am beginning to think that perhaps God want to talk to me about something in my quiet time (which usually happens at 6…I shower first. And maybe empty the dishwasher. Don’t judge. I don’t usually check my email or my phone, if that makes it better…) but I must not be listening. Yet.
But hopefully soon. Pray for me about that, would you?
With that, I shall leave you with this little ditty from the Carter Family (who just happened to be our musical group of choice for the PBA’s music appreciation yesterday). Enjoy!